"I have a theory that cyberbullying and sexting is partly our fault as adults because we’re still catching up to the digital world, and we’ve never really taught kids how to use it well. It’s kind of like putting them in a car without teaching them how to drive. So it’s no wonder mistakes have happened."
Dr. Rich said that Facebook can be used in positive ways by kids who are trying to understand themselves, to understand that they’re not alone in their challenges and struggles growing up, "whether it’s confronting the fact that their parents aren’t perfect, or that the world isn’t the way they magically thought it should be, or whether they are confused and conflicted about their sexuality. Social media can be particularly empowering for kids who are marginalized or minority groups of any kind. It is a wonderful environment for connecting with ‘people like me,’ and feeling that you’re not alone. And as a social equalizer, they create a fabulous place for kids to develop a sense of participatory democracy, a place where they have a voice. They start to see how their voice can make a difference in the world."
Some experts suggest that social media are having a certain benefit on the smarts of youngsters. In his 2005 book "Everything Bad Is Good for You: How Today’s Popular Culture Is Making Us Smarter" (New York: Riverhead Books, 2005), author Steven Johnson notes that IQ scores have improved in several different countries around the world in recent years, likely because youngsters are rehearsing the kind of skills required for IQ tests when they play computer games.
However, Dr. Shifrin pointed out that other research has shown that frequent exposure to videos and other screen-based media slows down language acquisition in toddlers.
Social media also have the potential to unite families in shared activities such as playing chess online, tennis on Nintendo’s Wii console, football on the Madden NFL video series, or updating the family Facebook page.
For some families, though, social media eat into quality time together, said Dr. O’Keeffe, who has two teenaged daughters and who authors a syndicated blog called "Dr. Gwenn Is In."
"We’ve all been at restaurants where mom and dad are plugged into their Blackberries or iPhones and the kids have their game systems or their cell phones, and no one’s talking to one another," she said. "We have a pretty strict rule at our house: no digital stuff or picking up the phone during family meals. When we go on vacation we lock the phones away. We go unplugged a few times a year. That teaches our kids that you can do it. Sometimes my 16-year-old will not turn on her computer for a few days in a row. I think you have to teach your kids when they’re young to resist the temptation. If they see you do it, they’ll do it."
Dr. Rich authors a blog called "Ask the Mediatrician," which answers parents’ questions about media and health. He worries that social networking sites such as Facebook are altering traditional notions of what it means to be a friend. "To a certain degree Facebook has made friends something you can compete on, the idea that I friended more people than you," he observed. "And social media fundamentally alter how we interact with other people. When you see two kids who are sitting at a table together texting each other, it’s a very different dynamic than if they were actually talking to each other. Why they make the choice to text as opposed to talk has something to do with it, but if it is the primary form of interaction, how do you learn to read people’s facial expressions or body language? To include others in a conversation? Or speak with nuances and empathy that text cannot convey?"
Dr. Greenfield is concerned that children and adolescents who spend too much time on social media may be compromising the proper development of certain cognitive skills. "We know that people are getting good at processing information very quickly and efficiently – the kind of skills you have when you’re driving," she said. "What we’re talking about is turning yourself into kind of a computer in a way: making efficient and fast responses as appropriate. This is very different from reading a book, which is very linear and slow. That’s what the brain needs to understand something usually; you don’t want to have it diluted and distracted, because the brain only has so much power. If it’s being employed in attending to lots of different things, it’s not going to be able to pursue a linear train of thought."